Friday, March 02, 2007
snowboardin' in the pro-land (part II)
unlike part I, part II of my column is converse - i simply couldn't resist
to conclude this stuff with wavs/sperms warfare.
without further ado, this is my take on the 15 western conference
teams, beginning with no. 15.
i have read that run-and-gun style is more efficient in scoring than
slow pace. so why then are the memphis cub-grizzlies the bottom of the
wild wild west? go figure. atkins, swift, d-stoudamire, d-jones,
alex-johnson are a quite unimpressive union. pau and mikey miller
keep this club alive, but i like the hakim warrick-rudy gay duo. esp
hakim is my pleasure. well, if they draft oden... so far, it's a
the trail blazers are well-coached and finally coming out of . . .
gloom, led by a rejuvenated zach randolph, a young shamrock of roy,
aldridge and jack; don't forget promising careers of webster, travis
outlaw or udoka. przybilla-magloire center is underachieving. thank
god for darius miles' injury. my fave player on this team is dan dickau, a
native from portland.
finally, rashard lewis is back and ray allen is still a bona fide
sniper. they have tons of young centers, even i don't remember their
names. just jokin'. power f's collision, wildfox and forkson. damien
wilkins, gelabale, unhappy-unhappy watson and luke ridnour make this
team average. my buddy, a fan of sonics, attends church every sunday
just to pray for not being relocated from seattle. tough times.
the golden age of kings is long gone and the most memorable moment from
this era is rob horry's game-winner. damn rough... they have a diamond
called kevin martin. love him. artest and bibby get along because they
have to. the oldies, brad m., kenny t., shareef a.-r., vitaly p.,
corliss w., need to go. away. keep price at any price and garcia.
here we go - the t-wolves (again, AGAIN) missing the money time. how
many light years it will last to trade HIM? never. for sure, kg'll opt
out of contract and they'll have a null result for him. their front
office is filled with spies which only aim is a sabotage. (what would
the firing of coach casey indicate?!) here we go - their silver and
bronze guys are ricky davis and mark blount. come on! jaric is good
pg for nobody, eddie griffin is good for not-playing, mad dog should
be a marathon runner, hudson-hassell combo should be starting for some
lower euroleague team. the keepers are craig smith, mccants & foye.
please don't tell me 777 times they'll be in the playoffs.
don't you know the warriors routine? before every season, talk about
advancing to the p.o. until a new year's eve play solid to be in the
hunt. then start fading. come april, the p.o. is out of reach. and
then november comes with a well-known phrase: we're makin' p.o. this
season. maybe try to fire adonal foyle, maybe he's the reason. again,
this team is pretty loaded: harrington, stephen jax, pietrus,
richardson, baron, jasike, even a young blood of roberson, biedrins &
monta ellis. again, they won't be THERE. PLEASE STOP YOUR GAB EVERY
when we've seen the injury of livingston with my girl, she made that
women's sound which i don't know how to imitate. pretty awful. i still
do not believe this may be a career-threatening pain. he's too young
and a tantalizer... the corey maggette saga is like a halley's comet. sam i
am is too old. that leaves brand, tim thomas, the cat, ross, aaron w.,
singleton and possibly daniel ewing to battle. looks like my dad is
gonna sleep in april and may. better than to watch being swept 0-4.
the hornets are back! no. 7 is maybe too much, but "8"? yes! suddenly,
they've come out of nowhere. ty chandler is picking down apples,
chris paul is a 2008 all-star, devin brown (a former spurs darling)
is proving that he belongs to this league, bobby j. still shoots his
jumpers. every nba fan knows that david west is a quality player but only
14 fans would recognize him in the street. i don't belong in this
group. although hilton armstrong and cedric simmons are d-league
bound, they have some upside. add rasual butler, pargo AND des mason
and you have a playoff team. an early exit doesn't bother. (note:
yesterday i played nba live 2003 and marc jackson is very decent
there. i needed to write this.)
if this still is a honeymoon in colorado... what it'll be in two, three
years? try to play iverson off the bench next season, it'd work.
ai-melo combination should arouse some big respect, but the suns are
WISHING a 1st rnd encounter with them. what if melo averages 38ppg &
the answer 33ppg and 9asts (and 7 turnovers per game)? don't care.
loss. overtime loss. loss. loss. the roster is not so bad, blake,
camby, dermarr, najera, nene, j.r., reggie evans, kleiza, but this is
west folks. try next year.
the darkhorse - la lakers. first, heal all the players. and that's it.
they're very dangerous. however, these days it's not like they're
smilin'. but we can. there's plenty of fun. someone is in utah,
mountains around, snowboarding and he falls down, walking, on the ice,
carrying a coffee (shouldn't it be a gun?). dislocated shoulder.
then he lies to his employers. then he says the truth. this story is
no-brainer for new blockbuster movie. the main character might be
called snowmanovic. yo, yo, kobe, luke, kwame, andrew, brian, maurice,
sasha, smush, jordan, ronny and this team makes flea proud. even deep
in the playoffs forest.
with big yao and great t-mac, the rockets are a legitimate juggernaut.
nobody wants to play them, believe me. please don't send spur-killer
bonzi against san antonio. i still feel this is the team that has
everything to win title THIS year (excluding a pg position). they're
my pick, because (A) i hate mavericks, (B) i don't like phoenix
much. shane battier, mutombo know how to defend. calm down rafer
alston, luther head. hope that chuck hayes and juwan howard are ready.
make all guys work for team. is this possible? yes, it is. and the
nba finals should be played in china in that case.
honestly, i'm not accustomed to see the jazz this high. carlos boozer
is a beast in the middle, deron w. is da man for 10 seasons. (the
official jazz nba.com's roster DOES NOT INCLUDE HIM. deron is simply
not there. i stared up-and-down and down-and-up six times and he's
not there. ridiculous.) mr. clutch for them is mehmet memo okur (i
like his beard and hairdo), along with derek .4 fisher, jarron collins
(would beat his brother in h-o-r-s-e, this game should be scheduled
for summer in las vegas, bets allowed), giricek, harpring,
do-everything kirilenko, paul millsap (rookie of year in the fair
world) - a core for a p.o. run. don't underestimate 'em.
no. 2 is set for the suns, blah, blah, blah, they're invincible,
they're better than showtime lakers, they're... i wonder how it will
work in the postseason. the regular season is perfectly suited for
their style and this doubts their chances, according to me. i'm
kinda (soon-to-be-died-out) defense fan, so don't bring this "hooray
for radical offense" to me. nash is a genius, matrix is a freak, boris
diaw is a complete player, bombers (raja, leandrinho, jones&jones),
a workhorse (kurt thomas) and amare stoudemire, whom i don't like,
kills defenses with his arsenal. if this is the fair world, phx wins
a 2007 c'ship and brings their 1 000 000 000 fans to state of joy.
oh, this world's not fair whatsoever. thus amare, steve, shawn (a.s.s.)
will be remembered as kings WITHOUT RINGS.
i see noone that can match with bigger-than-life mavericks when they
bring their A+ game. but last time i saw them on the p.o. hardwood -
they choked big-time. yeah, they're deep, with likes of harris,
buckner, croshere, dampier, diop, george. what does matter is to
convert shots in the clutch. when they make 'em, crown the champs.
hope that dirk (must-be mvp), terry, stack, josh h. are capable of
doing that. i'm looking forward to spurs-mavs series, definitely.
(wavs/sperms: this is how fans of dallas and s.a. call each other. i
don't go to the mavs forums, but i do go to spurs forums - and this is
fun. everyday some mav fan comes to the spurs forum and hits us with
"sperm" attack. we respond with "wav" rot (which, i hope, will be
upgraded to "waw") and that make a spicy relationship. do ya 'now how
many adjectives dallas' fans know? three to be precise. old, slow, non-athletic. (i managed to write about mavericks w/out no m-cuban
mention. a record.))
as for the spurs, they're doing fine. "3" seed is conquered. to prepare
for the p.o. is their mission. nothing else matters. keep rockin',
dudes. we'll attack from behind as an underdog and if we win rings
that's even twice sweeter than 2005. timmy d is his old self. remember
he was battling plantar f. in his foot last season. manu gino(i)bli is the
heart of spurs. when he's in his trademark frenzy, he's unstoppable.
tony longoria's playin' season by season better and better. he's
alright. bruce "ironman" bowen is NOT slipping. maybe he shoots worse
his corner treys. we have got a grand chemistry, horry, finley, barry
(the funniest spur in the media), ELSON, bonner, oberto (he looks like
44 yrs old homeless), vaughn, udrih (have you seen his myspace.com
site?). insurances are mel ely, jackie butler and james white (who'll
be ready in 2012). as always in the spurs i trust.
have a nice day.
p.s.: expecting everyone to act "accordingly" over the weekend (during
las vegas all-star game) is like expecting all married men in brazil
during carnival not to sleep with another woman. (-scoop jackson)
Posted by Foreigner in CS - Mar 2 2007 11:47AM
Posted by Luke_Mellow at 11:47 AM